Friday, October 31, 2008

Halloween fun

Batman and his side kick... Elmo
Me and my boys
Ready to save the world!

The boys had so much fun.
E had fun seeing how much candy he could fit into each hand at one time and N had fun running everywhere... and dang were they CUTE! 
See...

Thursday, October 30, 2008

A new day

Yesterday was just one of those days.

Last night I was reminded yet again why I am so blessed to be married to the man that I am.  
I was having a bit of a pity party, I had just bathed and cleaned E's belly "hole" applied the necessary medicines to help it heal, with the help of S (takes at least 2 to hold him down).  Also SO blessed to have her as a daughter!!! The boys were asleep and D came home from his bible study and I just collapsed into his arms.  ugh... oh whine whine whine... lol

And he reminded me that we were on the home stretch here, that were seeing lights at the end of our tunnel.  That there are times when this all seems just so overwhelming and impossible, but this is what God called us to do.  He sent us to ET to pick up this precious child and bring him home to his family to love and care for... no matter what that care looked like.

He reminded me YET AGAIN that we aren't alone, that we are covered by God and the prayers of others.  And that we would get through this together and with God. 

He's a pretty amazing guy!!

Then today as I played with E was awed at what a gift he is.  How sweet and strong and loving he is.  How he's been through some unspeakable sorrow, yet is still able to love us.  Today I think he got the concept that he is daddy and mommy's baby.  I was carrying him like a baby and he said, "E, baby?" I said yes "E is mommy and daddy's baby"  So he just kept repeating that back to me.  I was holding him to help him fall asleep for nap, and kissing his hand and the biggest grin came over his face and he cupped my cheek in his other hand.  He is a blessing. We wouldn't have known his love had we not brought him home.  N would not have known the love that he shares with his brother, had we not brought him here.  The boys hug each other all the time then chase each other around the house...lol  but they are brothers.  What a gift!

Thank you God!

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

sadness...

It's been one of those days ...one where you say to God "I appreciate that you won't give me more than I can handle, but I sure wish you didn't trust me so much"

E and I went to the Dr today to talk take the stitches out of his surgical site and I was shown how to care for it.  So honestly I have such a new respect for nurses because .... UGH!!!  God how come you thought I could do this?  I know you know me... you know how I am... why am I being called to have to do this?  I guess perhaps it's because you know I will.  I sure don't like it... but I will do it, there really isn't a choice right?  no choice means you just get over yourself and get it done.
But...dang...blech

And then there is a post on a blog I read that shares that another death has occurred at big AHOPE.  

It reads:
We are very sorry to share the sad news that Tilahun Yimer, one of our boys at AHOPE, died last week after succumbing to a brief illness.  He was one of the first AHOPE children, arriving in 2001.  He was very helpful with the younger children and a good student.  Tilahun was well-loved by the staff and children, who are grieving now.  
You can read more about him, and see his picture on the AHOPE site.

This is one of those times when I know God hears me, knows what my prayers are, and I don't understand his answers.

Why do children have to die without knowing the love of a family?  Not just in Ethiopia, but any where? Why is there this pain?  What more can I do?  

I know so many of the people that read this blog have already adopted or are in the process... but if you haven't ... would you pray about how you can help?  Not everyone is called to adopt, I totally get that, but would you pray for these children?  Would you pray for families to be able to step forward and bring them home?  Would you donate perhaps to one of the many organizations that help families with the financial burden of bringing these children home. (contact me I can tell you of some GREAT ones!)

Despite any of the fears and overwhelming feelings I have over our future and what lies ahead, I wouldn't trade this place for anything in the world.  I love my children, bio and adopted... I love that God placed this burden on my heart.  I love that I hurt for these children, because it means He has given me this burden and He WILL carry me through it.  



Tuesday, October 28, 2008

God hears our Prayers!

I am taking a study at our church called "God's Dwelling Place" by Beth Moore.  First I just have to say that God has given her a gift.  A true gift of taking the word of God and making it real or "dumbing it down" for someone like me.

This week's study was about the altar of incense in the tabernacle from the old testament.   The incense is representative of the prayers of the saints or of the people.

The point, in a nut shell, is that God hears our prayer.  We may not "see" immediate answers, in fact we may never fully see His answers but he ALWAYS hears them.  In the old testament tabernacle there was a veil that only the holiest of holies could step behind and speak to God. After Christ that veil was torn and the only veil left is the natural world.  We can essentially go straight to the throne of our God and share our prayers with Him.  

Why do I share this?  Because I have SO much I want to say to Him.  So much I want to ask Him.  I need to KNOW that He hears me.  I need to KNOW that there is a God who cares... that while I truly have no clue why things in this world happen the way they do, I don't know why He chooses to answer prayers of some and not of others... in the way we want them answered or they way we think they should be answered.  But I know He hears me and I know He cares, and I know He wants me to talk to Him.  


Monday, October 27, 2008

Over the top???

Disclaimer: The words in this post by no means are meant to start political "stuff" ;o)

Funny story.  We were driving on the interstate yesterday and I spot a license plate that reads "B OBAMA"  hhhmmm, Wonder if that's him driving that very nondescript car with no obvious entourage?  So we pull up next to the car, nope, not him...unless he's been to Michael Jackson's dermatologist. 

So one has to wonder, WHY?  Would you pay to put a presidential candidate on your license plate?  I can sort of see putting a sticker on your car (although I would not)...but on your license plate? 

Weird! 

Dentist

yuck
Today I take the boys to see the dentist.  
N isn't happy about it as he remembers having to have lots of work done.  But we have tried to assure him that it's really just a teeth cleaning today.

E however could have some issues.  I hate to have to take him, it would be great to give him some time off from docs, but he's got at least 2 teeth that are really bad... I can tell that and I am not a dentist...lol  

So say a little prayer for today, E hates having his teeth brushed so I am not sure how they will get their hands in that little mouth ;o)

EDIT:  YAY!!! Something was easy and relatively painless!!!  YAY again!  The 2 teeth I thought would have to go, did, and are gone.  They were so far gone they almost fell out in his hand.  E hated it, but it was over in like 2 minutes and out we went.  Now he's happily eating a popsicle. Thank you GOD!  And they don't need to see us for 6 months.  N's teeth were great as well.

Sunday, October 26, 2008

Grandma?!


This has been a very full and very good weekend.

Started with Friday when S got to eat lunch with a professor.  If you remember she is attending a special academy and they had a professor from a pretty prominent college in our state visit to talk about a book they are reviewing.  Apparently my S was insightful and asked great questions so the professor asked she and 2 other students to have lunch with he, his wife and some other teachers as a special treat.  Pretty cool to have been invited to share lunch and discuss a book. My girl who doesn't enjoy reading and dislikes her school with a passion... found something to enjoy and be proud of....hhhmmm maybe there's still hope? ;o)

Saturday we got to spend time with people from our Emmaus  community.  We took the boys with us.  One of the things I love about these people is the love they have not only for Christ, but that we have for each other.  N is our social butterfly so he just FEEDS off the people, they love on him and he loves on them.  And E even got into the game.  N would run and E would chase him and everyone would laugh and E would laugh.  It was such a joy to see them running and playing.  And E was coming a bit out of his shell.  He's SO cute!  And N is just a joy to watch interact with people.  He just has no fear, and loves to entertain his 'public'.  

So this brings us to the "Grandma?!" quote.  While spending time with these wonderful friends, a lady I haven't seen for quite a while came up to me and says "Are you a grandma?!!"  Ok so if you read the previous post you will see a recent picture of me, now I know I look tired... but DANG a grandma???!!! Time to go get the gray colored again!
I said "Um nope" to which she then said "Those aren't YOUR kids?!" 
I said "Yes they are!"
She says "Did you adopt them?"  
ok now I just wanted to say 'here's your sign'  but I just smiled and said "Yes we did"

GRANDMA?!  totally no offense to any grandmother's out there but sheesh... I am so not old enough to be a grandma yet.  





Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Just more fun







I took some pics and thought I would share, and I realized the other day that I cannot find a picture of my most amazing hubby and me together.  We always tend to be the other one behind the camera...lol  So its not a great pic, but you get to see it anyway...lol
But does E look fantastic or what... He is one amazing kid!  

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Perspective

I have learned so much about myself these last couple of months... or has it only been weeks? ;o)

I have had to go into the office a couple of hours recently to make up some time,cause I am out of vacation time and money...LOL... but I have so much to do outside of work. ;o)

Anyway...One thing I have found is that things are different.  When we first got back from ET with N I was lost... I had no idea what to do with myself.  So much of what I saw over there just made broke me, I wanted to do something, fix it, change it, sell all my possessions and save the world...you know... just kind of freaked out.

Then life settled in, and we began to look towards our next adoption and began to focus there.

Then E got sick and we waited, and then we got to ET and were tested beyond what we thought we knew how to handle.  And THEN we got home and we hadn't even seen testing.  I have learned about patience like never before, I have learned the meaning of humble.... all those things I thought I did well, and all those things I thought I could handle became unmanagable... I had to actually rely on my God like never before.  I will totally admit to forgetting that I needed Him in some of those times.  And I will admit to being less than Christ-like when dealing with nurses and doctors that just didn't do what I wanted them to...lol  But without Him I would never have survived with my sanity in tact...and we aren't done yet. ;o)

Going to work was so anti-climatic.  The worries and differences and fears and struggles just weren't the same... they were so ... trivial.  

I have other focus now... I can't quit work or anything yet...lol  but I sure will look at it in a different light.  


Tagged again

My dear blogging friend Jill has tagged me again...LOL
I am not sure if I have that many interesting things to say about myself.... ;o)
ok, here goes:

1.  Since I didn't put it in my last list, I do love to read blogs... love it! It's almost like reality TV but more reality. Well at least I think so.  I love to see what people are doing, how they are feeling and since most of them are adoption blogs I get SO much comfort just from knowing that others go through the same things I do.  And I love to read the joys of discovery and new referrals.  

2.  I used to be a huge 80's hair band fan. But I also LOVED Metallica.  yep, Metallica and Pantara  were 2 of my favorite bands.  I have been to their concerts and in mosh pits and everything.  Now I listen almost exclusively to Christian music, not because of some kind of boycott of Metallica or anything, I just prefer it now.  lol... I could probably still sing word for word many of their songs...lol  CRAZY days

3.  I am VERY disorganized.  Ok, well I have a system, I know where everything is, but noone else would be able to find my stuff.  I am a "pile girl"all my stuff is in piles and generally I just move them around.

4.  I am the oldest of 2 children.  And I always wanted a boy and a girl, boy first then a girl.  I got that ...but then God decided to give me some bonuses.

5.  I used to be a travel agent.  I LOVE to travel, I want to go so many places.  But in Aug of 2003 I got to go on my dream trip with my husband to Scotland for 8 days.  I had always wanted to go, there was an amazing deal, and we went.  It was unbelievably awesome!  I got to splash in the Loch Ness and walk the Highlands and sit in Edinburgh Castle.  

6.  I love all kinds of weird foods.  Not like the guy on food network that eats eyes and scorpions or anything.  But sushi, oysters, goat cheese... not really weird... but my family doesn't eat them so they are delicacies for me.

7. I do not like Sponge Bob Square Pants

Joys

Someone sent this link to me Joy Movie

Take a minute and watch sometimes it's great to be reminded of the joys in life.

There is a quote in the presentation that says:
'Courage does not always roar. Sometimes it is a quiet voice at the end of the day saying..."I will try again tomorrow" '  Mary Anne Radmacher

There are days when this reminder is priceless.

May you find your Joy today!

Sunday, October 19, 2008

Home again Home again jiggity jig

We are home again.  This time hopefully for good.  
We have a couple of out patient things to do, but things that 'should' not have us back there again for an extended period of time.
E was SO happy to be leaving today!
He was ready to get up and get dressed and kept saying "E go bye bye, E go bye bye".

I think the pain level he has been in and the secondary fever made it absolutely necessary to be there for the time we were... even if I do fuss about the place.  I really do want him to feel better, and think that while we are taking longer than we expected, he's going to just blow us away with how different he is once he actually feels better.

One of the huge blessings this time were the nurses, we really had some great ones!  We have had more than one nurse tell us that our story, and meeting E have confirmed for them that they want to adopt.  What a HUGE blessing! Thank you Lord for showing us blessings in the hard places.


Friday, October 17, 2008

musings

So tonight while I have some quiet time I was reading through some blogs.  Maybe I should have put that in my 'Tagged' thread... "I am addicted to blogs":o)

I love reading what others are doing and thinking, perhaps because it takes my mind elsewhere, because I know there are other's out there that feel the same way I do... and many that feel it more.

I began to have a realization that I have become a bit inwardly focused...not so much into myself per se but into my family.  I have some every day good old American issues, like finances, and jobs, and teenagers and toddlers.  And I also have a son who came to us in a state that for all intents and purposes would have killed him eventually if he weren't brought here.  I posted a blog earlier about the issues I have with his care in the Children's Hospital here and then I watched a short video on a blog that has a mother with a dying child in her arms... dying of something as "simple" as food deprivation.  

Why am I complaining?  Why am I fussing?  My son has something his parents didn't.  He has a chance at life.  He is in a place that while doctors won't speak to each other, at least they have the tools to get him better.  This has been a long road but it's one to life...not to death...as was surely his path.

I fuss about being tired, but I drove to the hospital in my warm dry car, I didn't walk there for miles hoping the helpers will take him and give him relief.  I can demand care, I have a choice.  

I am not sure why we were given this gift, but E is.  All of my children are gifts, they were given to one cracked pot ;o) ...but I thank the Lord for them.  For being born in a place that I do have the choice and that we have the ability to not only save, but love and be loved by our sweet children.

Thank you Lord.


Surgery done

but we are not home yet.

You see my sweet special boy is a pretty complex case, and he's not into doing things the easy way so he's still there. 

Actually the main part of his surgery went very well, all is good and healing, he's in a good deal of pain, but even that is subsiding.  Thank you God.

But he woke up the morning of surgery with a golf ball sized cheek and a fever.  I was surprised frankly that they did the surgery, but thankful!  But his fever kept rising so they fear an infection. They are keeping him for observation and to check some labs.

I cannot tell you how VERY disenchanted I am with this hospital though.  It's supposed to be a good hospital, it's a children's hospital for heavens' sake and they COMPLETELY lack in communication and follow through skills.  If I were not there with him 24/7 things wouldn't get done. And that's not because I am over bearing (at least I don't think so) but things that were ordered weren't done until I said, "hey are you going to do these tests"?

SO frustrating, if there were another hospital in the area, I would be taking him there in a heatbeat!!!

With that off my chest, I am glad he's where he may be able to get help, to finally become pain free and healthy, and to be a regular little boy. I was talking to a friend today and she said to me "I just want him to feel better, I want us to be able to go to the beach and play in the sand and just 'be'".  I agree!

A good sign is that when I left this afternoon, so daddy could take his shift, he was being R2D2 again...whirring, and beeping and making his little noises.  My sweet Little E is coming back. Thank you God!

Maybe we will post good news tomorrow. ;o)

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Quick update on tomorrow

ok, so I have to eat a bit of crow... and be thanking God for making things happen.

I asked him this morning to take care of tomorrow however he saw fit, but that we really did need to have the special surgeon in the OR to take care of some things.  And he took care of it. He will have done what he needs all together!  YAY

Thank you God!!!

Sunglasses


This isn't the best quality picture, my sweet S took it on her phone.  
Does anyone else's kids put their sunglasses on upside down?




Tomorrow...

is surgery day.

yuck.

In all actuality it's all for the best, and we believe this will be the thing that may finally move us forward yet again, in a really big and good way.

We found out what we thought was going to be out patient isn't really, we have to stay over night. Good thing we found that out today so we could try to make arrangements for the other kids on Friday.

I do have to rant a moment though.  We live very near a prominent children's hospital and all of our docs are affiliated and in the same building.  All our specialists any way, and they have NO communication skills.  It's unbelievable to me that they just cannot talk to each other.  We had this same problem while we were inpatient before, with lack of communication and things getting done.  And even our main specialist is not great at relaying things to us even.  Lab results, issues that are arising that he fails to tell us ... one of our other specialist's called him a whiner.  We don't really have a choice in this though because they are the only ones close enough to get to.   I truly wonder what parents that don't have a clue...or a care, do about this mess?  Perhaps their children only see one specialist so their cases aren't complicated? 

I am not a doctor by any stretch of the word, and there is still so much that I am learning about everything, but there are things that to me are common sense that they just don't get.

We were supposed to have 2 specialists in the OR tomorrow to "kill 2 birds with 1 stone" but since they didn't talk to each other we don't know if one of them will be there as needed.  And there is a significant need for him to be there.  

We know all thing work for the good, and somehow this will all work as it's supposed to... I am just not sure if God is trying to get me to stand up more... or have more patience?  ;o)




Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Bugs

I have a niece that just turned 2...the same day my N turned 4...in August.
This kid is a wonder.  She is cute as a button, tall, willowy and very sweet, I haven't asked permission to share pics on here so I won't, you will just have to take my word for it.

My brother, her father, is one intelligent guy.  When he was little we used to say we could see the wheels turning in his head when he was thinking.  He was the kid that really could have used some advanced teaching classes because he was just bored to tears in school.  And he married a very intelligent woman... so their daughter has a head start in that department. Now I don't know where nature or nurture comes in here...but little M is WAY ahead of her time.

As I said she just turned 2 yrs old, 2 months ago.  And she speaks in full on sentences... I am not talking "See Jane Run", I am talking, "I want to go find the locusts"  And if you ask her what the other name for locust is, she will tell you, "Cicada"!  She memorizes books and will tell you the whole story.

So, back to bugs, this kid LOVES bugs.  I am not talking just kind of likes them.  She LOVES them.  She loves to go out and find locust shells and then carries them around.  The other day we had brunch together and she had a big green caterpillar in a plastic jar that she carried everywhere.  She would have carried the caterpillar itself, but mommy and daddy drew the line. Today E and I stopped by to hang out and we went to a park.  M had a ziplock bag with her insects in it along, she also uses the ziplock bag to catch other bugs along the way.  She had a dead spider in her bag who she decided to get out and play with while we were at the park. Yep, she took the spider out ( I promise it was dead) and carried it all over the place, petting it and loving on it.  A SPIDER!!! blech

At one point along our walk E spotted a bug on the sidewalk and called M over to get it...lol  My little guy was annoyed at getting his hands dirty while his sweet little dainty girl cousin was picking up and playing with bugs.

I have told my brother that he's going to have to keep an eye out in her room for the things she will bring home... I mean most little girls want to bring home stray cats and dogs, not spiders and locusts. ;o)  He's also going to have to be prepared to have her graduate from college at like age 10...lol

Crazy stuff!

Monday, October 13, 2008

Tagged



Well, it's happened, I have been tagged, thank you Erin. ;o)

I am not sure I will be able to complete the challenge though.  I have seen so many people tagged, I am not sure I have 7 people to tag...lol
So here goes the 7 things:

1.  I lived in the country of Bahrain for 2 years from the age of 2yrs to 4 yrs old.  I rode a camel while there and the only other thing I remember from that time was when the Kentucky Fried Chicken opened.

2.  I hate heights, but I love roller coasters.  I have not always hated heights though, it's only since having children.  The weird part is that I love roller coasters, and even the one here locally that has no bottom, and stops at the top and hangs you over space for a full 7 seconds.... yee haw!!!

3.  I used to play the flute in Jr High.

4.  I can cross one eye, roll my tongue and wiggle my ears (without touching them ;o))

5.  I am a hopeless romantic. One of my favorite movie's was and is Breakfast Club.  I SO LOVED the character Judd Nelson played, the bad guy that just needed someone to see past it, and love him.  And I married that guy. :o) Not Judd Nelson, but my hubby was a bad kid, with a HUGE heart that just needed someone to believe in him.  And now he's an amazing guy, that I am truly blessed to have in my life.

6.  I was incredibly shy when I was younger, I was very happy that my last name started with a W so that I could sit in the back of the room.  I hated having any attention paid to me... I was very easily embarrassed.  Now I have no problem speaking in front of people, of standing out (good thing considering my family is rather hard to miss) :o)  

7.  I am addicted to Dancing With the Stars.  One of the only TV shows I have to watch. ;o)

ok I am tagging:
Andrea although her blog is confidential ;o)
...ok everyone else has been tagged... I am not so good at this game...that or I need to read more blogs...lol




Sunday, October 12, 2008

FireProof


We went to see the movie FireProof today.

What a movie!  It spoke about marriage and commitment, and our relationship to Christ.  Kirk Cameron is in it.  And I will be completely honest with you that he's not my favorite actor, but he did an excellent job in this movie.  

The same people that did Facing the Giants made this movie, in fact many of the same actors are in it.  

Something I learned while watching the movie was that Kirk Cameron refused to do love scenes with the actress in the movie... not that there are many love scenes.  But there is a scene where you don't actually see their faces, but it's because his real life wife was in the place of the actress.  In a day when there is so much infidelity in marriage, especially in Hollywood, I found this amazing.  And pretty doggon refreshing.

Go see it.  And while you are at it rent Facing the Giants.... GOOD stuff

Thursday, October 9, 2008

Call for action

This post is written by someone I very highly respect!  She has done amazing things for adoption alone, and for HIV+ children in particular.  Erin is one amazing chic!!

Perhaps someone will read it and feel God speaking to them?

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

One of those days

Remember the post about Adoption being a funny thing?  I think maybe I will rename it... parenting is a funny thing.

Today was one of those days.  Little E was just ornery.  We had more testing of boundaries than usual.  SO tiring!  Now I know it's how this is supposed to go, but it doesn't really matter how many books you read to get prepared...it's just not real life till you're in it.  

Plus we have S who is really struggling with being in her school.  She wants to badly to go back to the school she's zoned for, and we just aren't willing to let her give up.  She's not happy with us. oh well, we will have to be the bad guys here and make her keep this commitment at least through the first year. I am not sure which kid is testing boundaries more... the 15 yr old or the 3 yr old? ;o)    On a fun note, tomorrow is picture day at school for her, and her brother is going to drive her to school.  She wants to make sure that her hair stays just right.  And since Z is staying with us tonight and will be up early she asked him is he would take her.  He's a good guy!  He has alterior motives though because he has a bunch of friends there and he wants to see them.  ;o)

On a bummer note we do have to schedule surgery for little E.  It will be next Thursday if all goes as it's supposed to.  We really didn't want it, but we have been shown that it's best for all involved.  As I was reminded at least it's an option... we could be left with no options which would be life threatening.  So... there ya go. ;o) Surgery it is.  


Tuesday, October 7, 2008

LONG Day

Yesterday was a VERY long day!

E had an appointment in the morning to see of we would need surgery.  We were able to talk to the Dr and have them postpone it.  This is a surgery we don't really want, and it's really an elective, so we are electing not to do it for now.

Then we went on the another specialist, found out we will need to start some new meds as soon as I can get them from the pharmacy today.  We waited around yesterday at the hospital pharmacy to find out that they would have to get it together today. Argh!

Then we had to get to N's preschool, pick him up and take both boys to their regular Dr for check ups and shots.  Poor N had to have 5 and E had 2.  They were very brave!  Both boys woke up this morning with VERY sore arms.  

We didn't get home from all the appointments until 430pm.  All of us were exhausted.  Both boys were very good though, especially E who had been with me waiting in Dr rooms for most of the day.  

Oh, funny story.  N had to have some labwork we all went in to the room together.  One guy was doing the blood draw, and the other guy gave E a sticker.  One for him and one for N.  He then gave E another one for him and another one for N.  E decided that N only needed one though so refused to give up the others.  Perhaps he felt his day was longer so he deserved more?  Silly kid.  At least he gave up one right? ;o)

A little fun with E



This morning as I was getting things together to take N to preschool, I could hear little E.  He reminds me of R2-D2...remember him?  E makes all this little bleeps, beeps, bips and tongue flutters ALL the time.  It seems he's always making some kind of funny little noise.  He's SO mush cuter than that silly robot though!

We were later sitting at the table eating our cereal with the Gospel Music Channel on, and I began to bob my head to the music.  E looks at me and says "Dancing.  No!"  "Dancing. No."  All serious.  I began giggling, cause his face was so funny.  He looks at me with this serious face, then breaks into a huge smile and begins bobbing himself.  We start bobbing and laughing.  All of a sudden, like we planned it, we both stopped and quit laughing while still looking at each other..it was for just a second.  But almost as if neither of us could contain it any more we began laughing again.

This kid is a funny guy!  

Saturday, October 4, 2008

Adoption is a funny thing

I don't mean funny haha, but funny as in hhhmmmm.

The truth is that in the beginning way back in 2004...lol  We hadn't ever really thought of adoption.  Not that we were opposed to it in any way... well other than we had 2 teenagers and were loving the fact that we had so much freedom.  ;o)

But then God got hold of our hearts.  Funny how that works huh?  

We ran into so many road blocks in the beginning we began to think we had heard Him completely wrong, but then He started opening doors and windows.  Then He closed some like for countries that we had originally been researching.  

We landed in Ethiopia.  You know what the funny thing is?  When I first became a Christian I was so afraid God would send me somewhere like Africa... not because I disliked Africa, but because it seemed SO far away and so different.  Now I love that we have 2 little pieces of Africa here in our home and our hearts.

Adoption has changed the way we look at life.  How we live, how we love and how we view the world.  When we adoption N, and were in Ethiopia, I knew we would be back.  God knew what he was doing in giving us one child at a time ;o).  I knew we would be back though.  

And now we have E.  Our precious E.

There will always be that tug I think... that feeling like I could do this again.
  
Now don't anyone panic, we are NOT adopting again. 

But I hear of other families beginning the process again, or see the new families have been formed and I feel so much happiness...and an eensy bit of jealousy that we are now done.  I do some times wish I had another little girl. My husband would have a fit...lol  I think it's the feeling of getting to know a child that has lost so much and being able to help fill some void...and have them fill a void that only they can fill.  A child sized void, created by God.  One that I didn't know I had until He showed me.

I still read forums that I belonged to before(although I rarely respond any more) because I love to see the new referrals, and the new faces of these beautiful children.  I watch blogs so I can follow journeys.

I thank God that He placed that void and then filled it with my sons.

Adoption...It's Better than Good!


Friday, October 3, 2008

Another week

So the week progressed into being a fairly good week.  

Little E is still asserting his independence, and he's still not grasped the word no...lol  I tell you this kid has one stubborn streak.  And again I am so thankful for the way that it has helped him survive all that he has had to endure...lol  But it's hard when you are trying to assert parental authority.  The pretty cool thing is that he very much fits into the family.

Thursday we went to dermatology for some things that have been bothering me for a while, that his other specialists haven't really pursued.  Well it turns out I had reason to be worried. The derm doc called the other specialist who then said they thought they wanted to admit him for IV antibiotics because of infected areas.  I can tell you that I would have fought that one if I had had to... because some of the issues have been there and I have spoken about every daggon week since we have been home, and all of a sudden they want to admit him???  ok so the truth is that I would have admitted him of course if I had had to, but I sure would have made it known how unhappy I was about it.

As it turns out he is on oral medication that he is TAKING!  It's another victory, he's taking these meds by mouth as well.  YAY!!!

I am so over this issue of not having someone see the bigger picture of things, of having to reassert myself every time they "find" something new.  That really isn't new, they just haven't been paying attention to my telling them that it's there.

I have to digress a bit to E's stubborn streak.  Because he has a sweet streak about the same strength.  He's huge on making sure that if he gets something that N and S do too.  We were at a garden center this week and he got a tiny pumpkin.  He insisted on getting one for N and S.  He held on to them all the whole time we were there.  He and N have such a great time together, most of the time.  They have some pretty typical sibling things, but they really have fun wrestling and laughing and playing.  Such a great feeling.

N has really taken to having a brother more as well.  So much so that he keeps telling us that he needs more brothers and sisters...lol  There is a lady at his daycare that insists that we need a girl.  At this point we believe we are done.  But perhaps God has other plans someday.  One never knows.  WE aren't pursuing it, but we weren't the first time either. ;o)

Z also loves being the BIG brother. He's 6'3" and pretty imposing.  Tonight we all walked up to 7-11 for slurpees.  All 6 of us.  N on Z's shoulders, and E on Daddy's shoulders, with S and I arm in arm.  You should have seen the looks we received, and all I could think was... thank you God! Thank you for my family, thank you for blessing me so!  Thank you that you have given us Z and S that have embraced their new siblings, without fear or concern for the looks that we receive or the comments made. Thank you that we are able to share our love with these 2 boys they are gifts, on both good days and bad.  Thank you Lord!







Thursday, October 2, 2008

Just some fun...








E's first time at the beach.
And S showing the boys how to make bubbles

 with their fingers and dish soap...lol
  CUTE

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

YIKES!

ok, so I am not sure I am glad that I wasn't home for this or not...lol

Last night on my way home from bible study I called to let my hubby know I was on my way. And he says to me "Good!  We have had an interesting night!"  I, of course, am intrigued.

Apparently, D had put the boys to bed and was sure they were asleep.  He then had to run up to the job site he's working on to make sure is was closed up.  Our S was home, so of course the boys weren't alone, so he left.

Well sometime after he left, S heard noises upstairs so she went to investigate.  When she got up there the boys' door was ...LOCKED.  E had locked it from the inside.  She began to have a bit of a panic moment.  She called her friend upstairs that was here with her.  Neither could get it open.  They then began to beat on the door to wake up N so they could get him to unlock it. Wouldn't you know it?  The kid just kept on sleeping... through pounding and yelling... the kid sleeps like a ROCK!  Which is great when your 18 yr old comes in at midnight and the dogs bark, but not when they are locked in a room.

Our house was built in 1965 so any door keys we might have had are long gone.  And E normally just calls to us from his bed, he doesn't get up and play with the door.  

As S and friend are yelling and beating on the door, Daddy comes home.  He of course is more than a little curious as to why they are beating on the door to a room that is supposed to house sleeping boys. 

He pulls out his handy tools, and proceeds to break down the door, and replace then had to door handle completely.  No more locked doors.  He got E back to sleep. And was back downstairs by the time I got home.

Crazy stuff, and N slept through the WHOLE thing, even the changing of the locks. 

I had thought of putting those safety door covers in the inside handle before, but then I thought of those dangers, so of course didn't do that.  

So, word to the wise, make sure the kids can't lock themselves in their room, unless you have keys to the door...lol