Last February we were still wondering what we were going to do with our adoption when I got a very interesting phone call.
It was a Friday and I was in Bj's shopping when my cell phone rang. It was our social worker, she said they had a situation that they wanted to run past us. Now I have heard of people getting phone calls from their social worker like this ... something totally out of the blue that ended up what really cool consequences... so I braced myself.
There was a woman with a condition that we were open to, that was pregnant with twins, due within the week and she was going to place for adoption but they didn't have a family waiting open to this condition.
I had to grip my cart to steady myself. So many thoughts swirled in my head. TWINS! A boy and a girl. I have always wanted twins, I dreamed about them when I was little and prayed both times I was pregnant that I would have twins. This was the best of both worlds, twins AND each gender!!!
I told her that I would pray about it and speak to my husband about the possibility. My head was spinning with all the thoughts that go through your head when someone tells you this news. Could we afford all the things we would need in a week to accommodate twins? Could we get cribs, clothes, did I have enough time off work at this point, could we handle twins?
Our agency was willing to do some serious hoop jumping if we decided that we wanted these babies. And can I tell you I wanted nothing more that these 2 children at that moment.
As it turned out our church's women's conference was that weekend as well. So D and I discussed and then committed to praying about it over the weekend. I then began to obsess...lol I was rooming with a dear friend... and thank you God she's still my dear friend because I know I drove her batty with my musings and desire to know God's plan in this situation...lol
The first 2 days of the conference I prayed and wondered. I spoke to the pastor's facilitating the conference and talked about it with my friend. On the last day of the conference I was no closer to an answer when during one of the talk's the pastor said something that felt like God speaking right to me. All of a sudden I just stopped wondering, I just knew those babies weren't mine. That there was a little boy in Ethiopia that was waiting for me. I could almost see his face in that moment. I knew there would be a family that needed those babies, and that those babies needed another family. I was immediately calm. All the angst I had put myself in was for nothing. God had my answer all along, I just wrestled WAY to hard with my own desires and wants. I had always dreamed of twins... and so many things about this story seemed like they pointed to these babies being ours.
The funny thing is that my husband at home wasn't at all swayed from our original plan to get our son from Ethiopia. He was relieved that I didn't come home and tell him that I wanted those babies.
God then did show us our son, he was waiting for us, and he's now home with us.
Funny how things happen. ;o)
(those babies did find a home ;o)