He is ALWAYS Right

About 3 years ago we were in the process of moving into our second adoption from Ethiopia. It was February then… I was in BJ’s on a Thursday and got a call from our SW who was doing our HS. She had just gotten word that there was a set of twins about to be born in PA to a mother with hiv. They had no families ready and willing to think about this idea. She asked if we would be willing to take these twins.

I went into obsession mode….lol I have always wanted twins. These were close…not over seas, and I knew the odds of the babies actually being hiv+ were slim to none, but that didn’t matter to me. I WANTED these twins.

D did not.

I went on a women’s weekend and obsessed about these twins. I wanted these them.

D did not.

I prayed and talked about it, and prayed and talked about it. I read my bible for clues….

Prayed some more, and then asked others to pray with me.

The last day of the weekend my friend A was giving the sermon and I suddenly knew that I was wrong. I did not want the twins. I wasn’t supposed to be their mother. It was as if God had said to me that there was a little boy in Ethiopia waiting for me and that I needed to go get him.

E was my little boy. And he needed us!

I have been doing the same with the China situation. I wanted it. I looked at those babies and wanted to have them home with me. A sweet little girl with pokey piggy tails, a beautiful little boy with a dimpled grin. I could see my home blessed with them.

D did not.

Until today…

Today I opened my FB page and saw this blog post listed. I looked at that sweet little face, those beautiful little baby fingers, and that smooth baby Ethiopian skin.

My heart is calmed. My angst over ‘losing’ China is gone. My search is no longer needed. There is a child/children missing us in Ethiopia. I need to go find them.

I sit here in tears…thinking about how good my God is. He knows. He knows! He’s always right. I love that He loves me enough to tell me no…