What does the word "Friendship" mean to you?
Do you have a best friend?
Is it your husband? Your neighbor? The person you can call at any time day or night? Are they in your city or across the country? Perhaps across the world?
I have been thinking alot about friendships and what God is trying to teach me in my life right now.
My husband is my first and best friend. He knows everything about me and loves me anyway. He's a guy though, and you know how guys can be...they just don't understand some of those chick things like purses and shoes, and girl things. He will listen and support me in whatever I want...usually :o) (still working on the adoption thing) but it's not the same as having a good girl friend to talk to. Ya know?
I have been thinking alot about the mission trip I have coming up and have been praying for God's provision. I love each of my team mates, truly I do. However, I don't have a 'best' friend coming along. I don't have a person that I feel like when I have to make my frustrated face at, or the person to set me straight, or hold my hand when I cry.... This morning I was talking to my friend Laurie and she said to me that perhaps this was God's way of telling me that He wants to be my friend. He wants to be the one that I make faces at, or voice my frustrations to, or hold me when I cry.
I recently started reading Beth Moore's So Long Insecurity. It's a great book, but it does make you look at parts about your self that are uncomfortable. God has healed so many of my insecurities already. Truly He has worked some miracles in my life! I do still find myself getting caught in the trap of feeling lost and alone. A friend doesn't call and I take it personally, I send a text that isn't returned, I make a gesture that isn't returned, I don't have 100 followers on my blog...LOL... then I am reminded that I don't always return phone calls or texts and it's not because I don't love the person. I can't live my life expecting other's to make me happy, WAY too much pressure for the others! :o) I sure don't want that kind of pressure placed on me for heaven's sake. :o)
I do often wonder why God has chosen to put my closest friends across the country. But then I figure it's part of His plan to make me realize that He's to be my closest friend, my support, my rock, my everything. I still love those friends so very much...and God has blessed me richly with them...but He needs to be my rock and my portion. I pray for His strength to remember that in the days that I miss them and their companionship so much.
I pray He is your best friend today too.