I found when I came home from the last mission trip in June, and had met the boys that it was that much harder to come home here. I don't mean to my family, but here to America.
It was harder to reinsert myself into life, and to stop thinking about all those that I love in Ethiopia. I tried...STILL AM! To just let go and let God do his thing. But it's increaisingly harder to do so...lol
So while we waited and watched to see if we would get court dates, then found that we were/are still in this perpetual hold of waiting for the final pieces to come together, I became more and more sure that I needed to go back. Thus the searching for airfare, which I found, and then funding which came forth.
This time being in Ethiopia, on my own, just being able to soak it in, enjoy the time, be with the boys, love on my new 'chosen' family... it was the worst feeling to leave. The thing about Ethiopians is that they love you well. Of course there are those that do not, or are out to prove something or get something....just like here in the U.S... but those that do love you. Love you well. It's a gift.
I was surprised at how fast time went, and how many people I had to see, and how many I missed seeing because I ran out of time.
As I was walking through the streets of Lafto neighborhood with my little brother AB, I was struck by the gift I have been given. Six years ago, if you had told me that I would be in Ethiopia, by myself, walking the streets with a man that I consider my brother...talking about life and laughing so hard my sides hurt.. I would never have believed you. Or sitting in an orphange with my boys and my AB and AM playing Uno, laughing hysterically and filled to over flowing with love... I couldn't have imagined it.
I am more certain than any other time that a portion of my life is to be lived in Ethiopia. Not necessarily taking my whole family there, as it's not really feasible right now... but I think there's a way I can be there more often... still working out the plans, and praying about how God would have me make the changes needed to do it. And have D on board...since it's not his favorite plan to have me gone and him here with the boys. :)
Will you pray with me for direction? Also for my heart as this time I think it was filled with so much love that it's feeling the ache that much more for not being there in the land that takes hold of you and just won't let go. :)